Tube Etiquette: I've broken my vow

First of all, I'd like to thank everyone who has bought the book since the Evening Standard recommended it as essential reading for all commuters.   Hopefully the book will also be coming to a shop near you soon...watch this space...in the meantime it is still available on most book distribution websites including amazon.co.uk

So, I've actually broken my vow of not using the tube in January and broken it in spectacular style with three tube journeys in a week.  To be fair, I broke it for my friends who I was meeting in the West End and I knew I'd be late if I walked from the City.  Then, once I'd broken it, it seemed silly not to use it again once or twice. However, after etiquette observations on these travels, I am back to walking for a while.

It is clear from my book that I can be pretty intolerant of other people's tube rule breakages, however, I am stating for the record that I NEVER condone shouting and swearing at those guilty of a tube offence.  A gentle poke in the ribs perhaps when required, a polite comment to one's face definitely, but that's the limit.

So, imagine my horror yesterday when, having waited for all passengers to disembark the tube at London Bridge, I embarked (I'll come on to that later) and was politely asking the lady in front of me to move down the carriage to let the heaving throng behind me on too when the person behind me screeched down my ear 'For f***'s sake, just push them down you silly cow'. Horrified.

Had this person whispered something slightly less rude to me I would have giggled with them conspiratorially but I was so horrified that my normal put-down response completely escaped me.

So, here's a lesson to us all - etiquette in the right places, without the abuse. Thanks.

p.s. which brings me on to the word  'embark' - who the hell uses this in normal every day language? Mystified.